Why You Need to Bin New Year's Resolutions

Did you know that studies and surveys conducted around New Years Resolutions have shown that by the month of February, as many as 80% of resolutions will have been abandoned? Not only that, but these stats potentially mean that by the following December, near enough 100% would have been rejected!

Bonkers right?!

But this also means you’re probably not alone when it comes to fearing the dreaded rush to the gym on January 1st and the pressure to have it all figured out.

Like most January’s, you may be feeling that sense of panic to have nailed the year ahead before you’ve even gotten to the end of the month. So, instead of rushing off, packing your diary with activities and creating a list of resolutions that have you ticking the boxes, I want you to ask yourself this instead:

How do you feel leaving last year?

Did you achieve the things you wanted to in the last year?

What didn't you do that you wish you had?

And... what does that mean for your next year ahead?

We all know, life is meant to be lived, and at times it can all get a little all encompassing, I experience this too, and I find it really helpful to slow down, take the pressure off, take a step back and get some perspective. And never was there a better time to do this we enter a New Year, because you, me, all of us, bloody deserve to live life on our terms!

Another year has passed, you survived the challenges life threw your way, the ups and downs; not to mention having navigated the festive season that can heighten our emotions, set us on edge and for even the sanest of people have us wanting to hide away from all the social madness #guilty.

Now, there are many reasons New Years Resolutions fail, so let’s take a look at why taking a different approach and getting a new perspective will set you up for success.

Walk Before You Run

I hate running.

In fact, running to me is worse than squatting, and I do not like squatting. 

But, when it comes to setting big and audacious goals in January, so many of us seem to be sprinting to hit the finish line before we've actually figured out the track we need to run on.

It’s so easy as for us as humans to throw ourselves into the deep end, set off on our life marathon before we’ve trained ourselves to leave the couch, ultimately setting ourselves up to fail before we even begin.

I encourage you to want more. You can be grateful for what you have and still desire more. It’s healthy to aspire for more. But what we don’t want to do is repeat the same shitty patterns and beat ourselves up when we realise that we’re starting January with the same old to do list and mindset from last year.

Not fun.

Not helpful.

So instead, I think it’s about time we take a look at January in a different light.

The type of light that makes you look AMAZING, you know the one, that early morning light or those sunset vibes…and that’s not to say you’re not hot AF all the time, but this is the light that’s going to set you uppp!

It’s time to ease yourself in.

Let’s get to it.

1. Reflect, review and reset

Let’s use January to reflect and review where we are at and what we want more of.

Instead of rushing ahead, writing your to-do list and panicking about making the most of your New Year, New Me routine, instead I want you to consider slowing down and taking January as a month to set yourself up for a great year ahead and to reflect back on the year you just experienced.

Knowing that if you had hard moments or even a hard year, it does need to define your next year and it most definitely doesn’t mean you’re about to experience the same hardships. Knowing that those elating, pinch me moments when you felt most grateful and happy is something magical to have on repeat more often.

Write down what went well and what didn’t.

Get clear on the moments that may have felt pressing, but what you’ve learnt from them.

Write down the people and experiences that lit you up and why you want more of them.

What are you most grateful for knowing you have come to the end of another year, the good, the bad and the frankly, best forgotten moments?

2. Get clarity

What lessons did you learn from last year that have made you wiser and set you up to approach things differently this year?

Taking stock is a great place to build from.

It’s also a great place to start getting clearer on how you’re going to approach this next year without repeating old patterns; getting back with that toxic ex, picking up the Slimming World books, again... (you know who you are), continuing to do a job which doesn’t excite you, saying no to those awful work parties that you do not want to go to and generally starting to live life for you vs others.

Let’s stop compromising ourselves, so others aren’t compromised.

Taking a step back to reflect on your previous year will give you an understanding on what you truly want to bring into your life in the New Year. And when I say this, I don’t mean your big audacious goals, I want you to consider your emotions, how you feel when you’re the happiest, what you need to let go of or forgive, who you want to spend more or less time with.

Understanding why you want to feel a particular way, do certain things and learn from the lessons you have had along the way is a great place to start. Not to mention it sets the wheels in motion to take your vision boarding to a whole new level, you know, actually doing the things ON the board.

The clearer you are on how you want to show up in the world, the easier it will be to approach new driving forces.

3. Simple changes have big impact

As I said before, let’s walk before we run. Let’s put down the insane goals and rituals, which you THINK you should be doing to bring about the change or new things you’re after. You’ve never actually managed to stick to any of them anyway!

James Clear in Atomic Habits discusses the importance of Habit Stacking.

“One of the best ways to build a new habit is to identify a current habit you already do each day and then stack your new behaviour on top. This is called habit stacking.”

This means starting smaller and building them up to create larger changes or habits.

Social media has tricked us into comparing our current realities to someone else’s highlight reel, whether that be comparing our 5k month to their 35k month or comparing our twice weekly workouts to their twice daily workouts with all their meals prepped in advance.

I want you to reflect on a small, positive habit you built for yourself last year and consider a new habit you can stack on top of it to set you off on the right track.

Think laying out your gym clothes the night before as the initial habit, stacking it with getting up in the morning and going outside for a 10-minute walk in you pre organised gym gear.

Start small, Tesco’s right when they say ‘every little helps.’

4. Take responsibility

The hardest one of them all. Responsibility. That means knowing whatever new habits and goals you set yourself toward the end of January (you didn't need to have them organised by midnight on the 31st of December), you’re going to stick to. And be accountable for whether that happens of not.

Feeling supported working towards your goals is vital, whether that be with a coach, mentor, or even a friend who can be your accountability partner. You don’t need to do this alone and having the support of others can be the difference between seeing something through or failing before you’ve started.

If you’re exploring the idea of transformation, but there’s still a fair bit of resistance holding you back from taking the plunge, it might mean pushing past the fear and doing it anyway…

Always ensure that you’re the master of your own fate and future, and to avoid those who may make you feel guilty or sap your energy. You want to feel inspired, encouraged, and ready to take on anything this year. Because you can!

So now what…

You’ve reflected, reviewed, and started to reset…

Stop diving full force into lists, resolutions, and outlandish goals without first slowing down, reflecting, regaining clarity, and showing up as the version of yourself you desire to be the most.

Start small, seek accountability, and stop beating yourself up if you trip at the first hurdle. Change is tricky. Not hard, just tricky to navigate because our brains are wired to protect us and that can sometimes mean it tries to stop us doing things. Even if we want to do them. It’s time to take a look at New Year's Resolutions with a different perspective, not one that’s going to hold us back before we even begin.

Mindset is your key to making lasting change in the year ahead.

If you’d need some support in cracking the code of you, mastering your mindset, clarifying your goals and what you want for yourself, let’s have a chat. Book a consult call with me today and let’s figure out how you can start to live life on your terms.